PSX-Extreme-StaffPSX Extreme's "Extreme Duds" of 2005
We were fortunate not to have reviewed a ton of stinkers here at
PSX Extreme this year, but that doesn't mean we didn't play our share. You've
seen our Game of the Year awards, and our Extreme Picks, so it's time to take a
look at the worst games we had the misfortune of playing this year. We've
highlighted the quotes that best capture our thoughts on the game, so sit back
and enjoy the awfulness of our Extreme Duds.
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Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance
PSX Extreme Review Score:
4.3
"Long, frequent loads times, a poor camera, pitiful voice acting, and
boring gameplay are just a few of the many things wrong with Capcom’s brawler."
"Here’s a short list of things that have to load in just your first few
minutes each time you want to play: game settings, profile, game, going out the
door, leaving an area, fighting someone, taunting someone, talking to someone
selling something, pausing the game, navigating menus, entering a building,
putting on clothes… the list goes on and on."
"I will admit that after becoming disgusted with the game I had a good time
dressing my male character up in a purple halter top, green jean shorts, and
giving him wavy silver hair though. "
"Beat Down: Fists of Vengeance looks like a great idea
on paper, but it fails to be even mildly entertaining past the first hour of
play. "
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Constantine
PSX Extreme Review Score: 3.6
"Constantine (the game) is terrible."
"It's the kind of game where mediocrity was the design team's
ultimate goal right from the get-go."
"A long time ago, Old Man Murray wrote a long diatribe
about how the very worst action games were those that are packed with boxes and
crates. Constantine is packed with boxes and crates."
"Mere words cannot express how rectangular and simple
the environments are."
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Death By Degrees
PSX Extreme Review Score: 4.5
"Releasing a game this bad borders on criminal."
"I just got done fighting the camera, which is
positioned in a way that reminds me of the Resident Evil games on the
PlayStation. Has nobody ever read one of the 10,000 reviews that says that it
stinks? Even Capcom finally figured it out."
"Destructible crates. You have got to be kidding. We
haven’t moved past that in 2005?"
"The voice actors must have gotten up in the middle of the
night to do this script – they don’t sound too into things. The music is also
really bad "
"The only reason to even try Death By Degrees is if you
are trying for Death By Boredom. Look, the analog fighting thing just doesn’t
work. It didn’t work in Rise To Honor, and it certainly doesn’t work here."
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Frogger: Ancient Shadow
PSX Extreme Review Score:
3.0
"It's ruined by unresponsive controls and levels that
seem to be designed to point out just how broken those controls are."
"Oh look, you have to hop across a chain of breakaway
platforms, turn, jump, and stretch out Frogger's tongue to grab onto a swing at
the last moment. Too bad, because the controller ignored your jump input and
Frogger drowned. Not fun."
"Oddly enough, the PSP game has the graphical edge over
the PS2 game."
"Curse you Konami, for releasing Frogger: Ancient
Shadow, which made me scream and throw my controller."
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Smart Bomb
PSX Extreme Review Score:
3.0
"The concept behind Smart Bomb is fine, but the
execution is so poor that even the most die-hard puzzle fans will agree that
Smart Bomb is a dud."
"When a game can’t get the training mode right, you know
you’re in for a long day."
"To say it’s frustrating is an understatement."
"The controls are unresponsive, and are unable to keep
up with quick multiple button presses. Since the game requires quick decisions
and precise movement, this is a huge flaw."
"Smart Bomb is a terrible game. It’s not fun, it’s
infuriating, and it feels like a budget title that was rushed out the door."
"I read the reviews and ignored them, hoping that I would
find a few hours of enjoyment. I was a fool. Don’t make the same mistake, avoid
Smart Bomb at all costs."
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So there you have it – our worst games of 2005. As crazy as it
may seem, some of you guys like the games on this list, and that's cool; you're
obviously much more forgiving than we are. Don't hate us for hating on your
favorite game, just take satisfaction in knowing that you had a great time with
it, and we suffered. Tomorrow is the reader awards, so if you're looking to
share your opinion, vote in our poll or drop an email telling us about your
favorite game of 2005. Send it to Ps********@gm***.com .