Sometimes, I just feel like smacking Uwe Boll's hand like a mother swats a naughty child, saying something like, "NO. You don't play with that. That's only for big boys."
Uwe Boll seems to believe he can finally make a decent movie and this time, he's going with "Bloodrayne 3: Warhammer." …yeah, we have no idea what that means, either. It's either a severely bizarre melding of two things that really don't have much in common, or the title is almost entirely meaningless and we can simply expect a lot more in the way of blood and bad acting. But either way, this movie has been confirmed so there's no avoiding it, despite all the obvious comments that spring to mind…"there was no Bloodrayne 3 video game" and "what the snot does Warhammer have to do with it?" We do know that Kristanna Loken will return but we can only interpret that as meaning it's tough for her to find other work. She's worth seeing in tight outfits – don't get me wrong; I love hotties in skin-hugging leather – but beyond that, it's difficult to believe this movie will be anything all that spectacular. Heck, at this point, maybe Boll should just shoot for "mediocre."
Eh, maybe we're being too hard on the guy. Maybe he'll surprise everyone when Bloodrayne 3: Warhammer is one of the best and most under-appreciated action flicks of the year. …and maybe I'm marrying a super model with an IQ of 180 and moving to New Zealand tomorrow morning.