It's the return of my very personal "Once Upon A Time" series, due entirely to popular demand. For those of you who are unfamiliar, this began on a sudden whim late last year, when I decided to trust our excellent community with the retelling of a personal experience that I thought would be interesting. The response was amazing, so I continued it, and most of you probably know what came of it…quite the little adventure, but things have been quiet since.
So I was talking to Arnold last week, and I brought up the question of age regarding relationships. You guys will have to help me out too with your own opinions (what, you think I do this just for you?), so feel free to speak your mind. The reason I presented the question is because, now that I'm over 30, I'm starting to consider age difference for the first time in my life. So perhaps you may be asking, what prompted the consideration in the first place? Well, it stands to reason that if I go where most single people hang out (bars, clubs, etc.), I will typically find females that are a good deal younger than me. Now, I don't have any issue whatsoever with ladies in their mid-20s (uh, how could I?), but might they have an issue with me ? I'm a man…I can handle bad news, so let it fly, if you must.
For the record, my last girlfriend – yep, the unwitting star of my previous editorial series – was only 24, so clearly, it's not an issue for every girl. But I'm starting to talk to girls where 30 is pretty much their "limit," and it's starting to worry me… It concerns me because when I encounter a supremely cute waitress who can't possibly be any older than 21 or 22, I balk at the romantic request. The good news is I've never really had any difficulty talking to women; that's not bragging, because a lot of times, I don't have enough sense to realize when I'm making a fool out of myself. But I never worry about talking to any of them, no matter how hot or supposedly intimidating they may be. What's the worst that can happen? Yeah, I make a fool of myself…oooooh, no, whatever am I going to do? Go home and hang myself? Really, who cares ?
But for the first time, I hesitate talking to this girl, and it's entirely due to the age thing. Arnold tells me I'm over-thinking it – as I tend to do – and he's good at simplifying the issue to the point where I realize I should laugh at my overly complicated methods. But really, age does factor in somehow…doesn't it? It has to. Maybe it only alters what I have to say in regards to the opening line and first conversation. Maybe she wouldn't even guess that I'm that much older than her. Look, I've done this enough where I know for a fact that 32-year-old women and 22-year-old are very, very different, and you can't treat them both the same way. Thankfully, I've talked to enough where I have some experience with many ages, but now that I'm the one considering an age barrier…well, it's kinda freaking me out.
I'm human, not a demigod. No matter how much I've always wanted to be a character like Cloud (yep, still a nerd), I'm really not. LOL